s t a r l e t

I am uneasy.

I am a decisions-made kind of person. I have difficulty waiting on bureaucracy. Yet this week, I have to wait, because HR is hit-or-miss at best about getting back to a person. I do not know whether I should go ahead and make that DSS appointment -- indeed, whether I'll be insured this time next month -- because they couldn't be bothered to tell me this time last week whether I should ask my doctor to clear me to work from home! If I had known that the company did not view working from home as a reasonable accommodation, I would have got in touch with Recruiting so much earlier.

"It wouldn't have mattered," said Ann. "There weren't any open programs last week. There aren't any today."

Oh, they'll try to extend my leave for a week or so. I'm still going to be in the same pool as the rest of the applicants, who don't actually need to get out of that environment but who'll stand a better chance because their health didn't make them miss work. What happens while I'm waiting? How long will the application process take?

So I don't know what plans to make for myself, except maybe to get whatever extras I need taken care of now (eye test comes to mind, as well as dentistry). Time perhaps to buckle down and make them pay for as much as they can while they make me wait. It's the only fair trade.

I am not sitting comfortably, and maybe you're noticing that. I'm sorry if I'm not up to my usual standard of awesome. I'm sure once this stupid wait is over, I'll be back to good. Just be patient with me right now, okay?